Love and Grief
by Kristen3
Summary: When Mary's husband has a freak accident while rock climbing, she is faced with a devastating loss. But maybe she isn't as alone as she thinks.
1. Chapter 1

"Is this one all right, Mrs. Cronin?"

It took Mary a moment to realize the funeral director was talking to her. "What? Oh, yes. And it's actually Richards. Mary Richards." At a time like this, she felt the need to use her maiden name for some reason. She could hardly believe this was happening. How was it possible that she was looking at caskets for her husband? She was numb, but she knew she had to go through the motions. Steven had been a Congressman, which meant the funeral would be anything but private. The press would be there, Mary knew. If it hadn't been _her_ husband, she might even be covering the event. But her coworkers had been very understanding. They knew she couldn't be expected to cover the news at a time like this.

"Very well, then, Ms. Richards," the funeral director said. "I know this is a difficult time. I do want to make this as easy for you as I can."

Mary nodded. She knew the man was just doing his job. "Is that everything? I mean, can I go home now?"

"I suppose so. There are other details, but the casket was the most important. Usually, the deceased leaves some indication of his or her wishes, but your husband didn't do that, right?"

"No," Mary replied. "His death was….it was very sudden." He had been working so hard on yet another campaign. He was always dedicated to his job. But, once the election was over, he had wanted to take a trip. For some reason that Mary would never understand, he'd decided to go rock climbing. Some friends had suggested it, and he thought it would be the perfect thing to put his work out of his mind. Mary hadn't wanted him to go. Her husband had never been particularly athletic. But he'd insisted it would be perfectly safe. "It's not like I'll be alone. If anything happens, the guys will be there. It'll be fine." He'd kissed her. Despite her misgivings, Mary knew she couldn't stand in his way. She knew how hard this election had been on both of them. The time apart would probably be good for them. At least, that's what she had thought until she got the phone call. He had had a freak accident, a terrible fall. Paramedics were immediately called in. They rushed him to the hospital, but it had been too late. Just like that, Mary's world fell apart.

Still in a fog, Mary drove back home. Going through this on her own would've been hard enough, but there was also Rose. Mary's daughter was still a teenager. Rose tried to put on a brave face, knowing that her mother was suffering a loss too, but Mary knew Rose was hurting inside.

When she got home, Rose sat at the kitchen table, attempting to do homework. "How was it?"

Mary sighed. "Well, I picked out the casket. The funeral director's going to handle the rest of the details himself. I think he could tell that I wasn't in any shape to decide on flowers or music."

Rose nodded, understanding. "You know, I could've gone with you. You shouldn't have to do this alone."

A sad, humorless laugh came out of Mary. "I guess I should get used to doing things alone from now on."

Rose didn't quite know how to respond to that. There was no way to pretend that there wasn't a void in both of their lives. But then she remembered something. "Oh, you got a couple of messages while you were out. I let the machine pick up. One guy called from California, I think." She shrugged, having no idea who the calls were from.

"Thanks," Mary said. She took a deep breath, walking toward the phone. Even if Rose didn't know who had called, Mary thought she had a pretty good idea. It was a reminder that, a very long time ago, she'd had friends. Those years now seemed like something from another life, but she was grateful for those memories.


	2. Chapter 2

Mary pressed the button on the answering machine to play back the messages. For one brief second, she wished that one of the calls would be from Rhoda. But she knew that was virtually impossible. They hadn't spoken in almost two decades. If she'd known how Rhoda would react to what she'd said about her friend's husband-to-be, she wouldn't have said a word.

But she pushed those thoughts out of her mind as the machine beeped. "Well, Mary," a voice on the machine said, with a nervous laugh. "I know I haven't kept in touch like I promised I would. But once you got married, I didn't think you needed me bothering you."

The sound of Lou Grant's voice brought a sad smile to Mary's face. "I needed you. I need you now," she whispered.

"Well, anyway, I heard what happened to Steven, and I just wanted to say I'm sorry. If there's anything I can do, call me back and let me know. It's no trouble to get on a plane. I just wanted you to know I haven't forgotten you. I mean, how could I, right?" Once again, Lou chuckled nervously. "Anyway, call me, OK? I'm….worried about you." The last words were barely audible.

Mary felt another sad smile on her face. _Same old Lou_ , she thought, realizing she hadn't resorted to her old habit of calling him "Mr. Grant." It was strange, but another sign of how much she'd changed since those early days in Minneapolis. But Mary knew without a doubt that none of what she'd accomplished since then would've been possible if not for her wandering into the WJM newsroom all those years ago. It may have been a lifetime ago, but the memories that played in Mary's mind were as vivid as if they'd happened yesterday.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the machine beeping a second time. "Mary, Lou just called to tell me about Steven," Murray's voice said. "Wow….that's got to be rough. I would get on a plane to come see you, but Marie and I are kind of busy with our grandkids at the moment. Who knew I'd have _five_ grandchildren?" Murray laughed. "Well, I know you've got a lot on your plate right now, with the funeral and everything. Listen, if you need to talk, give me a call anytime. I mean it. I think Lou wants to come and see you for the funeral. I tried to tell him you might not want that, but of course he wouldn't listen. Anyway, Marie and I send our love. We'll certainly be thinking of you. Maybe, when all of this is over, you could visit us. Or we could visit you. But we can think about that later. Just...take care of yourself, OK?"

Mary could hear in his voice that Murray wasn't quite sure what to say. No wonder, when he usually had a wisecrack for any situation. Sometimes his jokes were the only thing that made the newsroom bearable. Of course, Steven had made her laugh, too. It was one of the first things she'd noticed about him. She'd fallen in love more quickly than she'd expected. With her dating history, she wanted to keep her guard up. But, somehow, Steven had gotten past all the walls she'd tried to build. How was she supposed to face life without him now?

She was so lost in her thoughts, she hadn't even noticed that Rose had come into the room. "Mom, are you OK?"

"No," Mary replied at once. "I mean….yes. I'm fine. Or at least I will be. You don't have to worry." She reached out, touching Rose's cheek the way she had when Rose was younger.

"Who were those people on the machine? Are they friends of yours?" Rose had noticed that, although her mom was friendly to her coworkers at the TV station, she wasn't particularly close to any of them. It made her think her mom must be very lonely, now that her father was gone.

"Yes, they're friends. Actually, more like family," Mary replied. "Before I met your father, I worked at a TV station in Minneapolis. The ratings were terrible, and our newsanchor was….not really bright. But we all got to be very close over the years. That was where I fell in love with TV news. If I hadn't done that, I might not have met your father."

Rose looked at her mother in surprise. She'd hardly ever heard her mom speak of her life before she'd been married. "How come you've never told me this?"

Mary shrugged. "We were abruptly fired after working together for seven years. I was devastated. I had no idea how I'd pull my life together after that. But, eventually, I did. I guess that's what I have to do now."

Seeing the expression on her mother's face broke Rose's heart. She hugged Mary tightly. "You'll do it again," she said. "Dad always said you never backed down from a challenge. He was right, you know."

Mary smiled just a bit. Right now, she didn't know how she'd get through another day, much less years without her husband. But she'd find a way, no matter what. Because it wasn't just her life she had to worry about this time. There was also Rose to consider. Somehow, that gave her a reason not to give up.


	3. Chapter 3

Mary wasn't sure how much more of this she could take. Before she knew it, it was time for Steven's wake. All evening, people had tried to comfort her by saying, "At least he didn't suffer." As if he was any less dead just because it was instantaneous! Still, she forced a smile, knowing people meant well. She glanced over at Rose, who sat in a corner with some friends. They were handing her tissues and offering their own words of comfort.

Mary sighed, wishing someone was there to comfort her. Mourners' cliched words hardly did the trick. But she reminded herself that this was one more thing she'd have to face alone. _This is how my life's going to be from now on_ , she thought. She knew all too well that it wouldn't be long until Rose went off to college and left her behind. She had always encouraged her daughter's independence, seeing it as a quality they shared. But now, the very thought of it scared her.

"Thank you," Mary said, when yet another of Steven's former colleagues offered their condolences. Just as she turned away from them, her eye was drawn to the door. There stood a man who took Mary's breath away. He'd changed some since she'd last seen him, but there was no mistaking it was Lou Grant.

As soon as she was sure it wasn't a hallucination, she walked over to him. "You came."

Lou nodded. "I told you I didn't mind getting on a plane, didn't I?"

Mary felt herself blush, remembering his phone message. "I tried calling you back, but there was no answer."

It was Lou's turn to look sheepish. "Well, I was sort of busy contacting the airline…."

All at once, Mary hugged him. He couldn't have shown up at a more perfect moment. How did he always do that, she wondered? From the moment she'd met him, he'd come into her life just when she needed him. "Thank you for coming," she whispered as she clung to him.

Lou gently pulled her off of him. "Even though I know I haven't kept in touch, I never stopped thinking about you. When I read in the paper about Steven's accident, I had to pick up a phone. Murray tried to talk me out of coming here, but I wouldn't listen. I know how hard this must've been for you."

Mary nodded. "If I hear one more time, 'he didn't suffer,' I think I may scream."

"Yeah, as if that makes it any better," Lou agreed. "So, listen, about this daughter of yours….any chance I could meet her?"

"Of course," Mary said at once. Until this moment, she'd almost forgotten about Rose.

Just then, Lou scanned the room. "How come I don't see Rhoda here, anyway? She wouldn't bail on you at a time like this, would she?"

"Well, it's a long story," Mary said with a sigh. The last thing she wanted to do was explain it to him now. "I'll tell you later, OK?"

Lou nodded. The idea that Mary and Rhoda weren't friends anymore was something he couldn't even imagine. He remembered how worried he'd been when Rhoda returned to her native New York. But, thankfully, Mary had moved on with her life, even though it was clear she missed Rhoda.

"Let me go get Rose," Mary said, suddenly feeling a rush of excitement. She approached the corner where Rose and her friends were huddled. "Rose?"

Rose turned, giving her mother a look that clearly said, "What do you want?!"

"Can you come with me for a moment? There's someone here I'd like you to meet."

Standing up, Rose barely hid a sigh. Couldn't her mom see that this was no picnic? Seeing her dad in the coffin had somehow made it all suddenly real. Thankfully her friends had come armed with several boxes of Kleenex, or else she'd never have survived. But, reluctantly, Rose went. The last thing her mom would want is to make a scene.

Mary walked back over to where Lou stood, unable to keep the smile off her face. "Mr. Grant," she said, before laughing a bit as she caught herself. "I mean, Lou, this is my daughter, Rose." She turned to Rose. "Lou was my first boss when I started in the news. If he hadn't hired me, I probably wouldn't have met your father."

"Oh," Rose said. "Hi."

Lou smiled. "You can call me Lou. Your mom used to have a hard time doing that." He gave Mary a teasing glance.

"OK," Rose replied, still clearly not sure what she was supposed to say.

"I know this whole thing has to be rough on both of you," Lou said. "That's why I came here."

Rose nodded, wondering what to say to this man. He may have been close to her mom, but he was a stranger to her.

"Plus, I happen to know how your mom is at funerals," Lou said, giving Mary a knowing glance.

Mary immediately felt a rush of embarrassment, realizing what he was talking about. "Oh, not that! I had totally forgotten!"

"How could you forget that?" Lou asked in astonishment.

"Forget what?" Rose asked, feeling as if this was a joke she wasn't in on.

"Well, at the station where we worked, there was this kids' show host, Chuckles the Clown. He used to dress up as a bunch of different characters and show cartoons and so on," Lou said. "One day, he was asked to be the head of a circus parade. They wanted him to go as Peter Peanut. They made the mistake of putting him ahead of the elephants. Unfortunately, one of the elephants tried to….shell him, and he died. We were all stunned. But, of course, a peanut being killed by an elephant, well, we couldn't help making jokes about it. It was just a way to handle the shock. But your mom didn't think it was very respectful to joke about a man's death." Lou glanced over at Mary, remembering what happened next. "She kept telling us to stop joking around, but we couldn't help ourselves. And then, at the funeral, the priest started talking about all of Chuckles' different characters. We were all listening. Well, most of us were, anyway."

Mary realized there was no way to not tell the rest of the story. "As the priest kept talking about Chuckles and everything he did, I started to laugh. People were looking at me, but I really couldn't stop, no matter how hard I tried. Then, the priest told me to stand up. I thought he was going to yell at me for laughing like that. But he didn't. He said that it was what Chuckles would have wanted. But all I could think about was how everyone was looking at me. The next thing I knew, I was crying. It was humiliating."

"You really did that?" Rose asked, amazed.

"I did," Mary said. "I had hoped no one remembered, but I should've known better." She gave Lou a look of mock anger.

"I bet there's a lot about your mom you don't know," Lou said.

"I guess so," Rose said. She thought she liked Lou, even though she barely knew him. Something about him reminded her of her father. She wondered if her mom thought the same thing.

"Let's not tell Rose everything right now," Mary said.

"OK," Lou agreed. "But I'm not going back to California right away. Maybe I could spend some more time with the two of you…."

To her own great surprise, Rose found herself smiling. She had thought she and her mother would be all alone now. But maybe that wasn't the case.

"I think we can arrange that," Mary said. Once again, she was grateful that her former boss had shown up here tonight. It was a reminder that things might not be so bad after all.

 **The End**


End file.
